Tag Archives: relationships

I’m writing a book… and here’s a peek!

Why write this book?

 

 

My friend Danna has been in receipt of my letters, cards, phone calls, e-mails, passions and grief for the past 20 years. Throughout all my misfortunes and catastrophes, I have somehow kept her amused and in stitches.  She has been nagging me to write a book for so long.

Curve balls.

I have been cutting and bagging the dead daffodils, tulips and irises and clearing the early spring debris so as the Asian lilies can reign in full glory. Consumed with juggling new plantings in the window boxes and dusting the cedar lintels over my windows to prevent a further infestation of carpenter bees, I didn’t notice, my kids were hurting. Of all the flowers in the garden, none are as important to me as watching my children bloom. They are not babies and do not live within walking distance, in fact if I have any discomfort in my life right now, it would be the distance I am from my kids. I learn a lot from watching my garden. Seeing the plants establish, in awe of mother nature and the beauty she affords us all. I have learnt so much from my children and my granddaughter. This week’s epiphany is no exception. I see how my mistakes have impacted their choices, My protectiveness has allowed them to adopt “prince or princess” behaviours that is hard on their partners. In my quest to build their self worth and teach them to accept nothing but the best, have I neglected to teach them humility?  Have I given to ease my pain rather than help them grow? I understand they will no longer “do” because “I am mum and I say that “I  need you to do this for me”. Just like I cannot control the bloom time of my flowers, just be ready for the moment …and enjoy it, when it comes, I cannot control the curve balls that are bouncing in my direction this week.

Do you know your why? Here’s mine..period!

I want to feel your warmth in person more often…I understand not every day but this time apart is not cricket.
I want to stroll with you at leisure.
lay down with you at night
I want to share  with you my orgasms and many of yours.
I want to lunch with you impromptu
and with my son and my daughter…and the same for you as you wish with either of them.
I want to share breakfasts on Sundays,
drop bys’ from the kids
sometimes with their partners
and then with their kids.
I want to be able to catch up with the kids at short notice
I want to enjoy our stamina and energy while we still have it
I want to know you are in the next room or that you are safe and  that you will be home before the sun sets.
I want to chat over coffee
Bathe together
lie in bed and watch tv
meet you for dinner
sneak away for a weekend
be in the lives of my grandchildren