I will start writing again in the new year. Right now, I would just like to say “have a good one” regarding New Years eve, to everyone who reads this. I didn’t meet my goals this year in terms of financial accomplishments, weight loss accomplishments, work achievements, knitting, sewing projects are not all complete. I did get a stack of stuff done though. I undertook several course of education. Spent time with my kids, both here and in Florida, caught up with my husband and enjoyed him being home much more than usual in the fourth quarter. I dealt with fears that have kept me from enjoying myself or being enjoyable to others. I made some money, broke new ground, lost fifteen pounds, worked in the garden, completed enough sewing and knitting projects to give in abundance to both my granddaughter and great niece. Could I have done better? Always. I had fun. I moved mountains in emotional progress and I’m looking forward to the new year with a sense of healthy anticipation. I know my kids are facing challenges. I trust they will be able to dig deep within and clear their hurdles and get closer to their goals. I wish you and yours the same well being and here’s to a good 2012. It may not be as plentiful as you would like. I wish you “enough”.
So so sad to leave Florida this morning…truth be told, it really has nothing to do with Florida, its because I feel so sad to leave my kids, their partners and my grand baby behind.
Yesterday was full of dark clouds. I’ve been working through some management instruction discs getting ready for a course I’m going to be attending in Austin in August. It’s high energy, full immersion, reach for the sky and accept nothing less than the stars. So much so, I was exhausted just watching the CD’s ….I don’t know that I am cut out for all of that stuff. I have done the eighty hour work weeks and given my all to prove myself to the big C as in Corporate…they eat you up and spit you out….. Just as I was approaching burnout, I came to the conclusion that there was no real balance and by working eighty something hours. In fact I was actually doing two people’s jobs in real terms. Add to that, at the time, my husband was at sea on deployment so there were two children (teenagers) to keep in check, force, cajole, encourage and bribe to help with housework, laundry and yard work all while trying to keep up with their interests, school work, love lives, well being, physical, mental and of course nutritional, oh and again, laundry! I’ve written degree programs, had my own business several times, Cooked for royalty and heads of state, and raised two kids. I know what is important to me. Being important in my kids lives, is far more important than being a millionaire. I need to organise my mind and feel confident in the direction that I am going. I would like more time with the people that are important to me…now I need to find a
Still working on my education CD’s. Beginning to see the light. will tell you all more later…oh and then I begin my investors course….more fun?
I spent most of my day delivering fliers for the short sale part of my real estate business. With temperatures typical of the deep south and a humidity to match, I stepped out at seven thirty and three hundred and something fliers and a dozen conversations later, I got home at two thirty, hot, sticky and sore.
I’m acknowledging the internal struggle I’m experiencing between work, maintaining a home and garden which I love, juggling my life to accommodate my husbands travels and schedule. I don’t have to make myself available and he would never ask me to put him first. I want to spend time with him. Hell, I could have stayed in the UK if I wanted to live alone. His job is extremely demanding, anything less would leave him bored.
I worked last night till midnight and decided to sleep in this morning…but when 05.45 came around, I was up and moving. Trimmed all the rose bushes while the heat was not so bad…the humidity could have been equal to that of a Turkish bath! Push mowed the front lawn to get the criss cross thing going on. John Deer’ed the back, cut in the flower beds and it was then 100 degrees and yucky. All of this while fielding phone calls, trying to strike deals, hold deals together, calm the troubled buyer/ seller. Come 2.30pm, I hadn’t eaten, just drunk a lake of lemon water. I called my hairdresser, went for a hair cut. Thought I would get an early night. I’m not enjoying being on my own this much. So I headed out and bought some mulch and 14 day lilies, Got them planted and watered in as the sun went down, came in and showered the sweat of the labor off me, ate some fruit and chicken, called hubby, face time with my baby, emailed my responses to work related issues, and here I am, still wide eyed and active….figuring out something that will help me sleep….my biorhythms must be off. No worries, I will lie in tomorrow!
This week has been challenging at best. I have gone to bed exhausted. Not so much by the work load but by the attitudes of the people I work with, not colleagues so much as random people who’s path I cross or who cross mine!. Poor ethics, poor social skills, all about me and I am too busy for you mind set but I want this deal/ project, liaison to work attitude.
It wasn’t me that broke the computer (again)! My wi fi modem had a heart attack, pappie had a new one installed and I’m up and running today. Phew… This week is going to be what I call a peddling week. My month goals are set. My plan of action is in place. I’m going through the motions for all intents and purposes. I call this peddling because even though I haven’t reached my destination, I know where I’m going and I have to pedal to get there. This morning I was peddling and I caught a glimpse of the destination…a little over the hill and far away a bit like a road runner cartoon but the mere glimpse of the finish line is enough to keep me motivated…and that motivation is for my blog, my work as a Realtor, my diet or eating plan (even when pappie is outshining me with his weight loss without the 4-5 mile morning frog march! ).
Today I am up bright and early. Getting ready to list a house, pick up keys from other houses, meet my son and granddaughter from the airport and have oodles of fun! They too are a huge part of my “why” and if you are reading this Daisy…so are you!